okay, my theory. alex, my brother took my diary. and read it. it has info about all my crushes. he now knows about mr swain, and thats why he keep's bringing it up. he told matt how i feel, which is why he's been acting weird. and he then put it back in my room. thanks, bro.
i think that i like to think im the worse off but im not not really. i'd like to think its reall love and he loves me back. but its not. not really. i'd like to think life has a point. that life is worth it without him. but its not. not really.